My husband and I have full custody of his 2 boys. I am helping to raise them- well actually with his new work schedule, I AM raising them! Their mother is mentally ill. It is so hard dealing with someone mentally ill. She has made parts of our life hell for the last 9 years. I never know when the phone rings and i see it's her, if it is going to be a civilized conversation or if she is going to cuss me out and and hang up on me. I can take it. What I can't stand it when she cusses out the boys. We are having a problem with the oldest boy, J, not wanting to go to her house for her visitation. We do talk him into going or sometimes just flat out make him go for the most part. Now, when there is something important scheduled on her weekend, we don't force him to go. He doesn't trust her to get out of bed and take him where he needs to go. This weekend, he was asked to come to a pitching clinic for baseball. The coach only asked a few kids to come and he was one of them. It is early on Saturday morning and he really wants to go. He is supposed to go to his Moms this afternoon, but told me he wanted to go to the pitching clinic tomorrow, then go to her house afterwards. He called her to explain and she cussed him up one side and down the other and put him on a guilt trip. After she treated him like that, he said he wasn't going to her house at all this weekend. Then she called back to talk to me. I tried explaining that she is pushing him away- every time he asks to stay home and she throws a fit- it pushes him away. That every single visitation weekend he doesn't want to come and we force him to, that once in awhile, it is okay for him to miss. He is 15 and before long it will be up to him and he won't EVER go- if she keeps it up. Of course, I get to hear how awful and horrible and I am. Then i just told her that i was sick of her cussing me and calling me every name in the book to the boys- that i am raising her children for HER and that deserves some respect! UGh- she ended up yelling and hanging up on me. I tried to call her back to tell her that I would MAKE him go to her house on Mothers Day, but she wouldn't answer. I called 84000 times and she would never pick up and she doesn't have an answering machine. OMG- I am so sick of dealing with her and feel so bad for the boys for having to go there. She keeps threatening to take us to court if we don't force them to come to her house. She told the oldest last night that if he didn't come she was gonna take his dad to court and they would throw him in jail! LOL! When I talked to her- I told her to quit threatening the kids with that- that there was no way they were gonna throw Murf in jail because our 15 year old son missed one weekend visitation every 3 or 4 months! That maybe instead of threatening it- she could just go ahead and file something so we could get this settled once and for all!
UGH! This boy is 15! What a shame that he has to go through this! It makes me sick for him!
I don't usually have to talk to her directly or have to deal with her. Murf usually handles it- but he wasn't home- and they never get anything resolved between the 2 of them- so I tried to help. Harumph! Some help!
I'm sure I'll have another day of dealing with her! Lord help me!!!
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